That's right: Bram Stoker's Dracula directed by Francis Ford Coppola IS sexiness. Sometimes even surprisingly so, even though we are talking about the 1990's aesthetic colliding with one of the most sex-obsessed works of literature ever.
An eerie discrepancy begins to eek into your head. Who the heck is this whiny Paddy Considine guy? Why does HE get to carry the shotgun out of the woods? It was supposed to be me!