That's right: Bram Stoker's Dracula directed by Francis Ford Coppola IS sexiness. Sometimes even surprisingly so, even though we are talking about the 1990's aesthetic colliding with one of the most sex-obsessed works of literature ever.
That Awkward Moment when the Star Man comes to meet you and totally blows your mind. Cause he's your son. And also the worst.
In a movie that fully rejects non-partisan storytelling, how should we handle the championing of one party's viewpoint and the vilification of another's?
The POTUS is kind of an arrogant gambler of American lives, but Gary is scary!
An eerie discrepancy begins to eek into your head. Who the heck is this whiny Paddy Considine guy? Why does HE get to carry the shotgun out of the woods? It was supposed to be me!
"And you, you're my favorite."
You know who IS trying here, though? Gary Oldman. Gary Oldman is trying.
The main problem with this guy is that he's just a moron.
Preview of coming attractions. I don't think Real Gary would be as pleased about Lost in Space as Tiny Gary apparently is.
Something about this relationship made me think about Plato's The Symposium. Stay with me, here